
The imbroglio between Macedonia and Greece has been resolved by default – by the coming to light of an ancient manuscript ceding sovereignty over both territories in perpetuity to today's Kosovo.
In addition, Kosovo would also hold claims over a region in south-east Bulgaria, formerly referred to as Bulgarian Macedonia until the Socialist regime changed the name to Pirin region.
Reaction to the development, which has far-reaching consequences not only for the protracted impasse over the name of Macedonia but for South-Eastern Europe politics, the economy, but also for the demographic future of Europe, drew immediate and impassioned reaction from a number of capitals.
In Pristina, there was immediate rejoicing at the imminent proclamation of Greater Kosovo. Coming hard on the heels of Kosovo's declaration of independence from Serbia, leaders in Pristina said they were ready to take the helm of what could be an economic giant in the Balkans.
"We are delighted to have played such a crucial role in resolving the dispute over the name between the two territories that must now accept their status as provinces of Greater Kosovo. Not only that, just one aspect is that the lucrative Bourgas-Alexandropoulis pipeline will have its terminal on Kosovo territory. We are delighted to add April 1 as yet another turning point date in our history."
Pristina was undertaking urgent consultations on appointing governors of Bulgaria, Macedonia and Greece. The presidents, prime ministers and cabinets would be allowed to stay in place for 24 hours as a transition measure, but would be expected to step down in favour of Kosovar appointees, a spokesman for the > Greater Kosovo provisional administration said.
Ahead of the Nato summit in Bucharest, which had been expected to devote considerable time and energy to the Macedonia name issue, officials were hastily redrafting the agenda. "We xpect that Kosovo will have to be > accepted as a de facto member of Nato. For the sake of stability, we do not want to alienate Kosovo, given that it now has command of the Greek and Macedonian navies," a Nato spokesperson said. When it was pointed out to him that Macedonia is landlocked and has no navy, the spokesperson responded: "This is all going to take a little getting used to".
In Pristina, entrepreneurs were quick to respond with placing orders to manufacture "Kosovo On Three Seas" t-shirts and were getting ready to produce the many additional Kosovar flags that would from now on hang from government buildings in Athens and Skopje.
A Kosovo spokesperson said the recently designed Kosovo flag would be updated to reflect the newly gained territories. The new design was expected to be presented later today.
Kosovar businessmen announced plans for new construction to take place in the Bansko ski resort.
The only misgiving expressed on Kosovo streets was that, having seceded from a country that was mainly Orthodox Christian, Kosovo now again had an Orthodox majority - Bulgarian Orthodox, Greek Orthodox and Macedonian Orthodox.
MYSTERY DOCUMENT
The extraordinary tale of the ancient document was first unearthed by specialists from the otherwise little-known Balkan Institute for Historical Arcana, who discovered that a parchment from the 11th century ceding today's Greece and Macedonia to Kosovo had been sold at a charity auction in Los Angeles.
Celebrity news website mnogosmeshen.com reported that, after a hard night's partying, the parchment had been the subject of intense bidding among wild party celebrities Paris Hilton, Lindsay Lohan and Britney Spears. Friends said that the three had gone to the auction as a means of getting Spears's mind off her recent custody battle. When it was all over, Hilton, who had bid $25 million, two luxury Beverly Hills properties and a solid diamond shoehorn she happened to have on her at the time, emerged as the new owner of the parchment. "She admitted that she could not read it," the friend said, "but that kind of thing can happen."
It was months later, when the parchment was inadvertently uploaded on her website as a fan letter, that academics trawling the internet found the document and it rapidly became, if not made, history.
INTERNATIONAL REACTION
European Commission spokesperson Ms April Pfuhl said that Brussels was studying the situation intently. She confirmed that protests had been lodged by representatives of Athens and Skopje, who had for the moment put aside their differences in the face of this new challenge.
Speaking from Helsinki, international law expert Nyama de Mrinkish said the Greeks and Macedonians should shed no tears over the situation. Dutch legal expert Moenie Huile echoed this view, noting that at least the number of EU states would remain the same - 27 - although there would have to be some reallocation of offices and MEPs, to say nothing of budget matters.
News crossed the Atlantic rapidly, becoming for some hours a matter of debate in the US elections. Democratic contender Hillary Clinton stirred controversy by claiming to have "been in at the founding" of Macedonia, which prompted race leader Barack Obama to snidely observe that, had Clinton been around to see Macedonia founded, she was a marvel of the plastic surgeon's art. "Did she initial the document too?" Obama quipped at a rally in the small Pennsylvania town of Whitelies.
In the sports arena, reaction was immediate. Not only could Kosovo now seriously look forward to being able to field a substantial team at the Beijing Olympics 2008, but also claim the status of a former host country, given its sovereignty over what, in transition, was being referred as The Former Republic of Greece. There was relief at Kosovar would-be Olympic athletes, who had been trying out for Zimbabwe, encouraged that they would be paid sums in excess of a billion dollars each. Disappointment ensued when it emerged that the currency in question was Zimbabwe, not US, dollars.
Football pundits were ecstatic at prospects of Dimitar Berbatov, born in the Macedonian ethnic enclave of Blagoevgrad in Bulgaria, qualifying on the grounds of birth to play for Greater Kosovo. "Manchester United, if it holds any hopes about a future with Berbatov, cannot think about competing at this level," exulted veteran football observer Michael Shields. It was rumoured that the Greater Kosovo national team would play its first friendly match against Serbia in Mitrovica in a few weeks time.


















