If you have watched the film My Big Fat Greek Wedding, you would be able to imagine the family relationships that and events that I shall describe now.

My grandmother is 87 years old. For as long as I can remember, she has been the core of the family on my father’s side. When she talks, my father, his two brothers, the wives, and we, the cousins (five of us), keep quiet. Her words to us are ever so important. For years now, on the two biggest Eastern Orthodox holidays, Christmas and Easter, the three families have been visiting the south-western town of Kyustendil, where my grandma lives.

As we pull off the road, in the car, outside my grandma’s house, she greets us from above, leaning out the window with a wave and a “come on, the table is ready”.

Yes, it is very much about the eating when we gather in Kyustendil. It is also very much about saying “nazdrave” (cheers, literally, “to health”) every five minutes, wishing health and happiness to everyone, taking photos of the numerous rich-in-fat but delicious dishes. And most of all (coming second in importance after the eating), the hours we spend around the table are very much about catching up on each other’s lives.

My family is not very religious but we do follow some religious traditions, perhaps mainly because it makes us feel like we belong to a Christian-Orthodox world, of which Bulgaria is a part, and most of all, to keep the traditions going for us kids, the next generation. Thus, an special part of our Easter (and Christmas) celebration is when, prior to attacking the table, my grandma gets up, turns to the East and says a prayer. The turning towards the East is because this is where Jerusalem is, which, for Christians (as well as Jews and Muslims), is a holy place.

Then we move on to the eating part, the egg fight part, and the nazdrave part.

It is normally a one-day visit, but boy, we certainly make the most of it. Everyone talks over each other; those who take on the housewife role (my mom and my aunts) keep going back and forth between the kitchen and the sitting room with the big table.

So this is how it goes. Unfortunately, now my grandma is quite old and those big family gatherings are decreasing in frequency by the year. Nonetheless, the great memories of warmth and love remain in my conscious. Regardless of my not-so-good religious beliefs, I unquestionably plan to bring my children up one day with the same values and the same close and traditional family spirit that I grew up with.

Radka Pochinkova
Born in 1919 in the village of Krainitsi

“When I was a little girl, Bulgaria was under a communist regime, which meant that having a religion was practically not allowed. It was not officially banned, but should the party catch you practising a religion, it would create a really dark spot on your reputation. You would become an outsider.

“In churches, there were party agents under cover. They would pretend that they were lighting candles, while they were actually checking who was going to church and would then report you to the party. But this never stopped me, or my family, from expressing our religious and cultural beliefs. During Easter, or any other big Christian holiday, we would still go to church without being afraid of the potential consequences. It was only lucky that we were never “caught”. But even if that happened, it wouldn’t have stopped us from expressing at home something as significant for us,as our religion, culture and traditions.”